Dear Diary,

      i put high hopes on people. and this is usually the cause of my hurt in any relationship. i expect people to do things i would do for them. i expect them to go the lengths for me. i expect them to be there when i need them to. i expect them to catch me when i'm falling. i expect them to be somewhat like me. and that is not gonna happen. never. never gonna happen.
      i should suck it up right? actually i am sucking it up. and i am doing it well. but still hurt. i cant avoid that. Sometimes i dont know whether they appreciate me. when im gone. you will know. you will feel it. if people keep disappointing me, i may not die but i'll smile to you and say its ok but inside its something different.

i am sorry for this honest entry.